So...Levi went in for surgery this morning to drain an infection (abscess). This is a fairly minor surgery but in light of the fact that he is just 42 days old and "such a little guy" the concern is still heavy on one's heart. When I found out yesterday that he would have to have surgery, my heart sunk and I struggled to see what was fair in the situation. How could one so small have to endure such suffering?
Upon asking the Lord this question, immediately, He spoke to my heart. He reminded me of those that have had to experience their child in moments of suffering or struggle. My friend Mandy, who delivered little Ellie at 27 or 28 weeks gestation and Paul and Adrienne who delivered their baby at 30 weeks...they have witnessed needles, IV's, and many sleepless nights with uncertainty for the next day. Yet, they are making it. God is providing and has provided for them. Even deeper, the Lord brought me to the feet of the Father.
As I was driving it was as if He placed himself in the passenger seat, held my hand, and said, "Lesley, I've been there. I know of your hurt. I, too, am a parent...a Father." My heart immediately broke as I thought of God's parental heart and how he must have grieved to see his One and Only Son suffer. The One who came to save the world was His. Yes, yes, my God knows suffering....far greater than I will ever have to witness in my sons.
God, Thank you for relating to me--thank you for never letting me go--thank you for being bigger than I'll ever know--thank you for suffering as a father--Thank You!
Comments